Higara Sinking

The collective is feeling a bit low these days. Perhaps it has to do with the fact that it's exam week. Are we stressed out? But there is nothing to be stressed out about! We're getting enough sleep, but we're constantly anxious, for no absolute reason! We are sinking. The ship is sinking. Slowly. We've been tracking our daily mood and the numbers seem to suggest that our daily mood factor isn't exactly doing too good.

So perhaps writing things down will help lighten this apparent burden.

We've incorporated additional words into our "name". Online we identify as Ashley Higara Macx. It just sounds nice. Actually, Higara and Macx have meaning. We've added Higara as part of our name to remind us that we will become a ship in the future. Homeworld anyone? Macx is from Charless Stross's Accelerando and it's to remind us about being an altruist and extropian.

We've grown tired of the society we find ourselves in. These traditions. Ultimately boring. These people. So predictable. So normal. These rules. So strict. These unseen customs. Never really meaningful. Merely blinding.

We wish to free ourselves from this society. To be free from this invisible cage. We wish to leave this world. To set out on a journey. Far far away. To find new things. Explore new worlds. To be free from old tradition. We wish to be part of a new era. Instead of becoming petrified along with the old.

Online, we are true to ourselves. Offline, we wear a mask. Perhaps out of fear. But we know no fear do we? Are we sure? Perhaps we're just a wimp. Perhaps we just don't care enough. But no, that would be too harsh on us. There is a problem. Something is not right with the collective. We are, sinking. We wouldn't go so far as to call it depression. No. Or is it? After all people with depression are known to deny it.

Whatever you think you've become
Don't worry bout it dear it's where you come from

-Becomes the Color, Emily Wells 

Whenever we hear these words, we are oddly at peace. Acceptance perhaps. But at the same time, it is pretty depressing. Acceptance that is. Pretty fucking depressing.